Winter 2004

This season all ran together for me. Like a drab watercolor of greys and blues, with coffee spilled on it, I look back and see a big blur of things I might have done. I have no sense of the passage of time. From the very beginning of the year until my Chicago trip, I don't know what happened. I've done a lot of things. It's not at all like I just stayed home and played on the computer or anything. I did plenty. I worked on at least three plays, helped out with a bunch of stuff, got my wisdom teeth extracted, did a whole bunch of assorted math contests and competitions (more than my share, let me tell you), I sang in a concert and on a field trip, and I went on yet another field trip to the planetarium. I also went to see a bunch of plays (at least four). And then Washington and Chicago. But for some reason, Chicago doesn't run in together with all that other stuff. Washington actually does, though, even though it happened only a few days earlier. Basically, from the time I went to Rent until the time I went to Phantom of the Opera runs together. After Phantom, I could see clearly again. Like I've said to many people, I count my life in terms of plays.

Now the tough question. Why is it that my winter runs together like this? The simple answer is that it was winter, and the weather is conducive to that kind of perception. However, we've had winters other years, and this certainly hasn't happened to me. For example, Nunsense, which took place roughly a year before Earnest, I remember as a brightly colored photo, while I remember Earnest itself as a depressing blend of greys and greens. Not that it was even a bad play. I enjoyed working on it a lot. But I don't remember it that way unless I think hard.

It could just be personal issues. I've had some, certainly. I've been dealing with a lot of emotions since the beginning of the school year, and it's possible that I'm only just beginning to resolve those. During a lot of this time, I became disillusioned with myself. For a time, I didn't really like the person that I was very much. Now, however, I like myself again. Which is good.

Anyway. I'm glad that Winter 2004 is over. It sucked, but it's finished, and I'll never have to go through anything quite the same again.